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I will go first, I'm a male by the way. I was abused both sexually, and physically. I was beat growing up by my father (yes, I do forgive him). I had a very hard life, but now at 34 I am dealing with it. To me my life was normal, it was all I had. I would watch shows on TV, and dream about having a family like that. Don't get me wrong, my mother tried her best to give us a good childhood. Now to the sexual abuse. Let me start with a little history. At around age 8, some friends were over at my house playing. One girl's big sister dared me and her to go into the closet and have sex. We being young didn't know what we were doing so we went into the closet, and acted like we did. Later that day, my father found out about it, and beat me severely in front of my friends. That taught me that sex was a bad thing. Now when I was sexually abuse at around age 9, by a 16 or17 year old girl, I was scared to death to tell anyone, I remembered the beating I had gotten. The abuse happened a few times, but I never told anyone. Now you are probably saying, a boy would be glad to be with an older girl like that. Well my friends you are dead wrong. Like I said, I was scared to death, because of the beating, but also because I was to young and immature to know what I was feeling or doing. Later when I was a young teenager around 13 or 14 I think. We went on a vacation to the beach for a week. While we were there an old man, abused me, and would offer me liquor to keep quiet. I only keep quiet because of the beating I had received a few years before about sex. He abused me a few times, but at the same time an older woman age 26, also abused me. Again you are probably thinking a teenage boy and an older woman, wow, good for him. It is still sexual abuse, I didn't know what I was doing, I wasn't in control, she was, she had the power. Plus, I still didn't know what I was doing or feeling, yes I did enjoy the feelings my body was giving me, but I did not understand them. Because of my abuse both sexual and physical, I couldn't have a girlfriend in school, I didn't know how to. Yes I wanted one, but at the same time I was scared of them. No I am not gay because of this, even now, at 34 I still have a hard time dealing with women at times, but with the help of counseling, I am over coming this. So to finish this up. Child Abuse is a life long problem, just because the abuse might stop, doesn't mean the pain will go away, both men and women can and are abused, although most guys don't see theirs as abuse but a conquest, when the offender is a woman. So I urge you, if you are a victim or an offender, please seek some help before it gets too late.
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